Thursday, November 4, 2010

TRUE LOVE

A little over a year ago I went to my friend's wedding in New Mexico( If you're reading this, Hi Chrissy!) She asked me to say a few words during the ceremony that had an eastern philosophy. I did some research, and found my inspiration through Thich Nhat Hanh's translations of the Buddha. I feel an overabundance of love in my life these days, True Love, and so I thought I'd share what the Buddha and TNH had to say about what True Love is.

According to Buddha, there are four elements to true love. Maitri, karuna, mudita, and upeksha.

Maitri translates as loving-kindness or benevolence. This is not only the desire to bring happiness and joy to another person, but the actual ability to do so. This ability comes from understanding. Understanding is the essence of love. In order to understand a person we must have time; we must practice looking deeply into this person. We must be there, attentive; we must observe, we must look deeply.

Karuna means compassion. This is not only the desire to ease the pain of another person, but the ability to do so. Knowledge and understanding are at the root of compassion. The practice of compassion is the practice of meditation. To meditate is to look deeply into the heart of things.

Mudita means joy. If there is joy in love, it is true love. If there is no joy in your love, you cannot be sure that it is true love.

Upeksha means equanimity or freedom. In true love you attain freedom. When you love, you bring freedom to the one you love. Love in such a way that the person you love feels free, not only outside, but also inside. You can ask your dear one, do you have enough space in your heart and all around you for your love to comfortably live?

Above all, in the context of Buddhism, to love is to be there. The most precious gift you can give to the one you love is true presence.

Namaste.

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